The first photo was taken by accident as I tried to get the ..

The first photo was taken by accident as I tried to get the bluetooth to work. It really captured the behind the scene (covid sickness) vibes very well. I'm pretty this was before I put my make up on, but don't quote me on that. The second photo was taken around 4:00 AM right after I thought, "The only thing that would make this any more difficult would be if my eyelashes fell off like they did that time at the convention when I had no eyelash glue on me..." You really can't make this stuff up! Of course, OF COURSE, that's what happened next. My eyes are bloodshot from being awake for almost 24 hours (the shortness of breath makes sleeping very difficult), and working on a computer screen for 12 hours before finally getting a chance the take these long overdue photos. I did two photo shoots that night, the end of July banger; and this adorable set that's about to go up on my VIP in a little while. At first I tried to hide the fact that I was sick from everyone because I felt like no one would want to tip me if they found out. (Irrational fear, I know.) What ended up happening was people started complaining that I was horrible at my job. Being a people pleaser this was incredibly difficult for me to go through, and I had a breakdown. So not only was I hallucinating from my fever, but I couldn't stop crying from the sadness I felt. It wasn't fair that I either had to share my personal business, or suffer horrific comments from people who subscribed to my page for 50% off. I was listening to a mental health podcast once, and they essentially said, 'You don't owe anyone an explanation for whatever struggles you are going through.' I still stand by the fact that it is my business, and has I chosen to continue keeping that to myself, it was 100% my right to do so. But the I couldn't handle my DMs blowing up with hate any more, during a time when I need love the most. So now you all know the real reason why my posting slowed for a bit, and hopefully you can fully appreciate the fact that I am overworking myself with a flu that is killing people, just so you can have your content on time. The haters wanted to bully me until I broke, over $7 mind you. But you can't break me, like a phoenix I will always rise. So today's post honors that. These are the photos you don't usually get to see. This is the real me, for your viewing pleasure.